Once again, truth is stranger than fiction. The Police Calls section of the Green Bay Press-Gazette from this past Friday yielded a number of gems… • Theft: Three hubcaps were taken from a Dodge Stratus parked in the 600 block of South Adams Street on March 22. Loss estimated at $125. OK, so did the [...]

crime, media, Small Town News | No Comments »

Here is the first installment of what I plan to be a regular feature here on the Pants. Stories about the exploits of Mensa rejects, and whether or not alcohol is listed as a factor in their shenanigans, entitled “Was Alcohol a Factor?“. This first story comes to us from Billings, MT. Seems one Phillip [...]

crime, media, Was Alcohol a Factor? | No Comments »

Dateline Sissonville West Virginia. Straight A student gets F. World ends. Somebody better pay. Yea, that’s right. It’s about time. It sure as hell isn’t the kid’s fault they turned the project in a day late. We certainly wouldn’t want to teach anything about responsibility, priorities or repercussions. Nope. Sue ‘em. The kid has a [...]

crime, education, politics | 1 Comment »

Seriously.  How can this load of crap still be one of the lead stories on most of the online news outlets?!?!  Google News has aggregated no fewer than 4,291 articles on the ridiculous saga that is Anna Nicole Smith.  It’s also number 2 story on CNN.com and has it’s own little section on the front [...]

arts & entertainment, crime, current events, media | No Comments »

The Stella Awards cover outrageous court cases. They were inspired by Stella Liebeck. In 1992, Stella, then 79, spilled a cup of McDonald’s coffee onto her lap, burning herself. A New Mexico jury awarded her $2.9 million in damages. The top five Stella Awards for 2006 can be found here. For those who just can’t [...]

crime, funny | 1 Comment »

So you have the munchies.  And you’re a fiscally frugal individual (aka cheapskate).  You’re jonesin’ for a convenience store hotdog and you come up with diabolical plan to put not one, but two dogs on your bun… and mask the wiener deception with extra condiments. You didn’t count on a) the clerk noticing/caring, b) the [...]

crime, food | No Comments »

An article from Reuters points out some thought-provoking prison points to ponder about the U.S. in relation to the world. • The United States has the largest prison population and the highest rate of incarceration in the world. • A record 7 million people — or one in every 32 American adults — were behind [...]

crime, current events | No Comments »

A Vancouver, Washington mother has been charged with making her son masquerade as a mentally retarded person for nearly 20 years so she could collect government aid… aid that prosecutors say is over $200,000. CNN had side-by-side video this morning of the mother pleading her case for benefits for her “severely retarded son” on one [...]

crime, current events | No Comments »

There are a lot of ways to handle a feud.  You could talk things over, you could refuse to talk to each other for years, you could drive past the house late at night honking your car horn… orrrr you could spray paint some goats. The quote in the secondary headline was “‘Obviously it’s not an [...]

crime | No Comments »

Apparently Mr. Dog has had another run-in with authorities this evening.  Seems that after performing on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno… No, seriously.  Stop laughing!  It’s not that funny.  What, just because Leno’s demo averages 60+ doesn’t mean they don’t get into a little gangsta once in a while. Anyway, after performing on the [...]

arts & entertainment, crime, media | No Comments »

A man from West Bend, WI, runs headfirst into a light pole in order to secure himself a PlayStation 3. A woman in Austin, TX, decides to wait in line for a PlayStation 3 even though she knows next to nothing about the system. Actual quote: “I heard this was going to be good.” Homeless [...]

arts & entertainment, crime, current events, media | 1 Comment »

“I was departing a small commuter airport in Southern California last week and I found myself in jail!” So begins the tale of a young man detained and arrested for possession of *gasp* a rubber band ball by TSA agents. He was also suspected of being under the influence of a controlled substance, which turned [...]

crime, current events, travel | No Comments »

Some luggage handlers hate their job. Some love it. And then there’s this guy. Charged with 110 counts of theft and stalking after taking both head and pubic hair from lost pieces of luggage that he was in charge of returning. When the police busted him they found baggies labeled with the names of the [...]

crime, travel | No Comments »

Police officers in Racine, WI arrested a man for possession of 18 pounds of [tag]marijuana/[tag] last week after a traffic stop, but the investigation then went high tech. Read on… Technorati Tags: Racine, WI

business, crime, technology | No Comments »

What on earth goes on in Nebraska? Kevin Holder was just arrested Sunday morning in Lincoln with burglar tools in his possession. This marks his, are you ready, 226th arrest in 26 years. That’s around 8.6 arrests a year, and the average only goes higher when you factor in that he’s done three felony prison [...]

crime, current events | No Comments »